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Adventures in Lawn Mowing – Part 2

Published June 23, 2014 - 0 Comments

homer-phone-300x291“Thank you for calling MTD Canada.  Please enter the Canadian Tire model number of the lawn mower you are inquiring about.  This number may begin with a zero, and may contain a dash.  If it contains two dashes, please enter the numbers priot to the second dash.”

WTF?!? It may begin with a zero?   I need something a little more defnitive than it may begin with a zero.  What if it doesn’t?  I don’t see any numbers that start with zero on the mower!  And what’s this thing about it may contain a dash, but if it contains TWO dashes then input the numbers before the second dash.  What if it doesn’t contain a dash? What if it has THREE dashes?  OK.. here’s a number… it starts with a six.  Wonderful… let’s try it.

“That number is invalid.  Please enter the number again or wait for instructions on where to locate your model number.”

OK… this should be interesting…

“Your model number is located in three locations – on your Canadian Tire receipt, on the original packaging, and on your user manual.  This number may begin with a zero…”

You’ve got to be kidding  me.  The receipt?  The original packaging?  You know where a good place to put the model number might be???  On the fucking lawn mower!

After searching through old user manuals, I finally found the one in question… only to discover that the model number listed on the cover was the exact same number that I had tried earlier from the mower.  I had forgotten one of the rules!  It didn’t start with zero, but it DID contain TWO dashes, so I needed to use only the numbers before the second dash.  Finally after putting the right model number…

“Thank you for calling MTD Canada.  Our offices are currently closed.  Please call back Monday-Friday 8am-5pm EST”

It’s a wonder I didn’t light that mower on fire and push it over the nearest cliff.