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Do You Have to Consider Her Mood Before Offering Your Input?

Published April 3, 2013 - 1 Comment

Do You Have to Consider Her Mood Before Offering Your Input?

Are you serious?  What kind of question is that?  Isn’t that rule #1 for dealing with any woman?  C’mon.. this is a trick question…

But actually that was a real question that the family mediator asked me today.  I remember being asked that in late 2011 when we originally set up our child custody agreement.  I thought that it was weird then.  I thought it was weird now.  But the answer was still the same…  “yes”.  I’m not really sure what the purpose of that question is.  Is it to judge her mental stability, or my empathy?  I don’t know.  But I would say that I consider my ex-wife’s mood before offering my input.  Does that mean that I hold off if she’s in a bad mood, or that I “go for it”?  I don’t know.  But I consider it!  And truth is, I probably consider any person’s mood.  It just seems like a silly question to me.  Out of place among the “Have you threatened to kill her, your children, or yourself?” or “Does she possess any weapons that you may be afraid of?” questions…

The purpose of today’s meeting was to officially announce my desire to amend our child custody agreement.  Circumstances have changed since 2011.  I am no longer a shift worker.  I no longer live nearly an hour away from the children.  I am pursuing a home purchase in the same area as their schools, and feel the time is right to step up and become a full-time parent in a shared-custody arrangement.  My ex-wife is less than thrilled with the idea, but to her credit she apparently made an appointment with the mediator as well.  I’m hoping that means that she is willing to sit down and discuss this, because we all know what the alternative is.  Court.  And really… no one wants to go there if it can be avoided.