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Double Sided Tape: The Bane of All Mankind’s Existence…

Published December 18, 2011 - 5 Comments

I am a horrible gift wrapper.  I always have been, and barring some sort of cyborg implant, I suspect that I always will be.  I’M the reason people use gift bags.  It has nothing to do with saving the environment.  It has everything to do with the fact that I can’t wrap even the simplest box and have it not look like it’s a kindergarten paper mache project.  Actually, I’d consider myself even somewhat capable if it looked that good.  But it doesn’t.

So what do I find so difficult about wrapping gifts?  Well… first there’s deciding how much paper to use.  I almost always use too much, and when I don’t… I use too little.  Then there’s the cutting of that paper.  Straight lines are definitely not my thing.  And folding the edges down and over, and then taping them?  Yeah.. not so much!  The end result is…. well… it ain’t pretty!

So last night I grudgingly sat down to start wrapping some of this year’s gifts.  I was part way through my first one, wondering why the hell my fingers were sticking to the tape, when I noticed the words “DOUBLE SIDED” on the package.  Huh???  I thought that stuff was only used by women attempting to wear incredibly skimpy dresses without suffering the dreaded wardrobe malfunction.  How did this get placed on the shelf next to the wrapping paper?  Obviously this was a mistake or one hell of a cruel joke.  Either way, it’s all I had so I attempted to use it as best as I could.

Yeah.. it’s going in the garbage and I’m going to buy some REAL tape and pay more attention to what it says on the package.

And next year everyone is getting gift cards!